Stopped Clock

tick
these eyes, don’t go to you anymore
skipping over you like so many missed
sundays
spent sleeping in your arms
curled up in between your breath, and your heart
beating seconds into my inner ears
tick
one beat for two ears, two beats for one
keeping rhythm with each other, by not listening to either one

but how do i tell the time anymore, and
how do i predict when you’ll be back?
if time has stopped for this clock, and our faces meet
i’m afraid it’ll stop for you as well, wherever you are,
so, you see Julia, i can’t look at that space above our doorway anymore
where our faces would greet each other’s,
at the threshold, in the mornings,
and late at nights,
and i refuse to breathe into the clock anymore, moving its hands, with my memory of you
for it’ll take a long time and a hard while to get used to: resting my eyes on its face,
if it ever begins to emote again
and i really don’t want to,
and till you walk in, like you walked out
in hidden monosyllables kept next to your car keys, jangling, as you drove away in the middle of that
night,
i’ll be here, listening to the wind
try to catch its own tongue
and crying out in frustration

tick

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